the big C scare

Just when I had my plans for 2010 roughly (i’m not really good at planning) laid out, something popped up that ‘shook’ my world last week. My nanay had an ultrasound last monday, which showed some cyst on her uterus (or somehwere in that area). Nowadays, when you hear the word ‘cyst,’ it’s the C that you will first think about. The OB advised that it’s best my nanay would have ‘raspa’ (D-C) the soonest so that the cyst can be checked if its benign or malignant. That way we can prevent it if ever the results would not look that sunshiny. At that moment, all I saw were alert lights blinking at me, the uncertainty level was sooo high.

As much as I tried to be cool about it or think positive thoughts, I cannot avoid but felt scared. The idea of helplessness is actually what scared me most. Seeing people suffering from that disease, and you cannot do nothing much about it is just too painful to think about. 

Since my nanay had a stroke history, and is hypertensive, we had to get a clearance first from her IM doctor. So she had an xray and some blood tests. And, as a typical Hollywood story goes, some minor probs just creeped out of nowhere. Her chest xray showed she had a pneuomonia though it’s nothing serious (though she never had some coughing incident), and her sugar was a bit high — in short she is diabetic now. In a way, the C scare was a blessing in disguise because her other ‘ailments’ were found out before it blows up. (Though, I feel that her high sugar might be just because she was also stressed at that time.)

The ‘cyst,’ the pneumonia, the high sugar did not paint a happy picture last week. But thankfully, it ended like a Hollywood movie should be. The result of her ‘raspa’ (sorry, i don’t know what’s the english medical term for that) turned out well — it was not C.

With the event last week, all my thoughts went disarray. So now I’m starting to reconstruct them again. I think lesson of the story is obvious — I must be mindful of our health. Because even ‘preventive cure’ is still way expensive, and not to mention the emotional torture that one has to go through.

On the other thought, however careful we are, God has some way of turning things upside down and incomprehensible. I believe during these times, our only way to battle it is faith in Him and acceptance, and try to see the bigger story out of it instead of wallowing in sadness.