on this the day — the underdog king was born

Mati being the youngest always has this soft and innocent streak that makes him irresistible to the parents. I guess that’s always the role of youngest, right?

Meg, as the only girl, is always cute though she can be irritating/annoying but that comes with her package That’s what gives her the ‘personality.’

And, there’s migi. Being the eldest will always make him something special. He always holds a special spot in my heart. To which I feel guilty about because I feel I’m short in making him feel that way. I always have this nagging feeling of guilt for not always being there for him. Pro’lly because he always does not have my full attention exclusively — the work i need to go back after my maternity leave with him, then came meg, then mati. He is somewhat left on his own with ‘ate mona.’ As the eldest, unintentionally, I always look at him to be the ‘last’ priority in terms of giving attention. Like if all 3 are demanding something from me, most of the time, I’d always put him last in the list assuming that he’d understand because he’s the ‘kuya’ therefore by default he is the most mature among the brood. And, when he’d whine and get moody, and throw childish tantrums, at times I’d get frustrated and disappointed because I don’t understand why he cannot understand me that my hands are still full with his 2 younger siblings. (It really gets crazy when all 3 are in chorus demanding for my attention — someone one wants her butt to be washed off, another one wants to be brought outside, another one wants to be spoonfed and they all want me and me only to do it all for them simultaneously. then everybody’s temper goes high up in the ceiling because I was not able to attend to their needs ora mismo.)

But I fail to take into account that though he’s the eldest, he’s just 4 years old, who still is in ‘me first me first’ stage. And when I realized that, that’s when the guilty feeling sets in. I feel bad for somehow rubbing him off of his childhood — he never gets the spoiling a 4yr old should get… for failing to give him the pampering a child should get. for not having my attention all over him, and the many many little things a child would want.

I don’t know if it’s because of this that sometimes I’d see migi as someone who always strive harder, make the loudest noise/do all the acrobatic stuffs, which would sometimes throw me off because I’m already tired keeping up with the younger 2, just so he could get the attention from us. I always feel guilty for — that things can be a bit harder for him. He always need to compete, he always need to make extra effort to be on the top, he always has to fight to be first on the priority list. (*being an only child, i really do not know how these sibling rivalry works. if there is really such thing. how bad/good can it be?)

but not to be gloomy about it, i hope this will give him that go-getter attitude, the fight-for-my-right attitude, that positive strong attitude in life. yes, i believe in that because he is my migi. =)

happy birthday, migi boy! thank you for being such a ‘kuya’ to mati. and for being a tom to meg (jerry) –> totally annoying but makes home a lot livelier. =)