how to deal with 1st-days-of-school separation anxiety?

simple. do not deal with it.
sorry to disappoint us, mothers, but majority of the kids are not that unreasonably attached to the parents
it’s just a hype. hype created by parenting magazines so they have something to write during opening of class season.

as what i saw (this is not a reliable observation), probably 3-5 kids out 20 have this ‘crying fits’ during 1st day of school
but i do not think it’s about separation anxiety
it’s just their way of adjusting to their new world
crying is somehow the most effective way of venting out the feelings they cannot expressed
so let them cry because it’s their way of coping

owkei. here are some tips. we, people, love to see ‘do this’ bullet list though we really do not follow them because i know that you know already this:

1. talk. explain to the child that he/she would be drop off to school blahblahblah. once you’re in school, say a quick goodbye then leave. do not make any drama farewell because it might send wrong signal to the kid.

2. if he throw fits, give the child a quick hug or whatever usual act of assurance you give him then let the school staffs handle him/her. then, leave, quick. do not make any drama because you’re just making it hard for the school staffs to deal with your child. remember these school personnels have been taking care of this kind of situation for years so they know what to do.

3. if you feel that your child’s going to have difficulty of letting go of you once you’re in school, stay at home and let the ‘ate’/yaya/caregiver send your child off to school. this might be sound off but it works (there might be exceptions). i got this advice from the psychometrician of FORUM school (the school where migi was not accepted. it’s a nice school, by the way.) kids tend to act more when their parents are around because somehow they know parents will give in to their whims.

and, i noticed that boys tend to have more difficulty with 1st days of school. i see it in migi and meg. and, in their class, it’s usually the boys are crying/throwing tantrums. too lazy to reearch for some supporting documents but i know there are studies that said that girls mature faster than boys so this could be the reason.

so one thing that works with migi in this case — putting him in new environment — is introducing him the idea a little by little, not in an obvious way. like, just giving a quick trip to the school just to see it. tell him from time to time the new idea until it just sinks in him. as tedious as it is, but, most of the time, we have to go thru this process with migi when introducing new things to him. but i guess it differs from one kid to another — just to give an idea on how to find a way of making kids comfortable with new things.

but as i said, majority of the kids do not go thru any anxieties on the 1st day of school. we can never underestimate what’s inside their little heads. =)